Monday, June 15, 2009

It's all over...

So, after all the fuss about Jessica and Adam's wedding......just like that, it's all over. After a chaotic, stressful, humiliating (for me), and sweet weekend, it's over. They are married and on their honeymoon, and here I am, still alive. I was very hurt this weekend. I thought for sure things would have been different, but I was not the official photographer.....I was the official musician though...without a lick of music and having never played the songs before!!!! I guess it was ok. The ceremony was absolutely perfect.

I am 100 % tired of Satan's lies. I wasn't so much angry about the photographer thing, I was hurt. And, after all of it, I found out Jessica did want me for the photographer, the man just flat out told a lie to me about it, and I almost "very literally" had a nervous breakdown. I really was not cut out for it. I am so sick of all of the problems I have. Hopefully things will get better before they get worse. It's over now, and cannot be changed. Now, maybe things will calm back down, and I will be less busy and less stressed.

I don't know how I stay so busy though. I don't have a job. I am almost positive that people who work that know me probably think they wish they could stay at home like me. The truth is I stay so busy trying to do so much for everyone else. I enjoy getting out sometimes, I would go nuts if I never got to go, but every Monday night I have Bible college, every Tuesday night church, Wednesdays are free, Thursday night Derrick has drill at the fire department, and so far every weekend has been occupied by something. Maybe life will slow down though. I wish it could all be simple and sweet. Not so much chaos, but I don't know how!!!

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